"I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me" - Philippians 4:13

You may be wondering why the title of this post, but our journey to parenthood has been currently postponed - at least that's how I'm looking at it, just a bump in our road....

Yesterday during my 12 week appointment, sadly I learned I had miscarried. So far I had been feeling well, so honestly hadn't suspected anything to be wrong. During the appointment, the nurse and my doctor tried to hear the baby's heartbeat with the handheld doppler, but didn't have any luck. We thought at first this was due to my uterus being "retroverted", meaning it tilts backwards. So the plan was to have a quick ultrasound, so I could leave the appointment having heard the heartbeat. At that point of my appointment, there was no reason to suspect anything was wrong. Just that the baby was sitting further back so harder to hear.

As I was having the ultrasound, I guess you could say it was my "mother's intuition", but I could tell that something wasn't right. The sweet woman doing my ultrasound wasn't saying much and by the questions she was asking me, I knew the outcome wasn't going to be good. She finally turned to me, showed me the screen and delivered the bad news - there was no heartbeat. It was pretty hard news to take, after having 2 previous ultrasounds with such a strong heartbeats, but my doctor explained that it was more than likely a chromosomal issue that happened at conception and I would have miscarried on my own eventually.

Jason and I realize that this has happened for a reason and we are extremely lucky to have gotten pregnant so quickly - sadly many couples aren't even that lucky. We also take comfort in knowing it is God's way of helping us grow stronger as a couple and even better parents.

Thank you for all the prayers, phone calls, and emails. While it has been an emotional couple of days, I've taken comfort that our first Butterbean is now in Heaven with my parents, taking a piece of Jason and I to heaven.

I'm signing off the blog for a bit, since I started this to journal my pregnancy. We will see what the future holds, hopefully I'll be back soon!

Attack of of "pregnancy brain"....

Well I've heard about this mystery thing call pregnancy brain in all the books I'm reading an thus far, I didn't think I had really experienced... Until today...

So this morning was like any other, alarm goes off, get up shower, get ready for work. Nothing out of the ordinary - just your average Monday start of the week. As I'm getting dressed and I keep thinking to myself "wow I got ready really fast today", but just figured I managed to get myself up out of the bed a few minutes earlier. That yes is the case, however I did get ready faster than normal.. It's not until I'm a in the car, a mile down the road that I just happen to look in the rear view mirror and there it is....

I'M NOT WEARING ANY MAKE UP!

Yes, I managed to forget a very important step in my morning routine - putting on make up. Well needless to say at that point while I'm driving I said forget it, slapped on some lipstick and decided to go about my day.

I did call my very sweet husband and asked if he noticed anything different about me this morning, he said "no why?" - poor thing probably thought he was getting set up by pregnancy hormones, but lucky for him no set up, just my stupidity of the day!

If this is already happening, I'm scared what the next 6 months are going to be like!

10 Week - Belly Update

Well this is the first official belly picture we've taken. I probably should have taken an early one, so we could see the difference :)
What matters right now, is that I can still button my jeans!

It's official!

Well I've been contemplating starting a blog for a while and I figure no time is better than now....

Jason and I are excited to announce that we are adding to our family - I'm pregnant!!

This is the first positive test on May 24th. However Jason was in disbelief, so he made me do another one the next day.....

Test #1 and test #2 - I think it might just be true!

I'm 10 weeks right now, but here is our ultrasound at 8 weeks, meet our little Butterbean. Jason's nickname growing up was Butterbean Dean, so we thought it was a perfect name for our little blessing!

Butterbean's estimated arrival is January 26, 2010! Please keep us in your prayers as we follow this journey to an new and exciting time in our life!